My inner child has been a tiny bit restless, I say ‘tiny’ because she’s pretty small, and imagine that she is still cute – not the annoying and terrible thing that her older brother saw her as. The image of the child above the text here is not of little me. Sadly, the link that I found for this image was posted at has been abandoned:
404 – File or directory not found.
Therefore, I am rescuing this child’s image! It’s what I’d imagine my inner child would have been like if she ‘lived a little.’ When we look at children, some of them are fearless and open and abundant with their thoughts. They play around with their friends with the industriousness of a full imagination just pouring out into the world. On any given day, there could be epic missions, and heroic rescues. They live with the purpose of their imaginations and process their emotions as moments that come and go. One day there’s a fall from a bike, wailing and tears. The next day the child is doing bicycle loops around their dad who is beyond proud of them: stunning and amazed. We are most amazed by how independent children are, how despite all the influencing around them, they still end up just being themselves. Many of them are confident and busy at play. To me, this IS the essence of my inner child.
When I used to work with children and tutor them, I enjoyed seeing their eyes light up when they reached within themselves and drew a picture, or answered a math question, or danced to a song by their own choreography. Many of the students I saw in my classroom wanted to be singer/songwriter/musicians/acrobats. Many of them wanted to be stars, celebrities. My heart ached when one of my students felt excluded from an activity that the administration was doing for students who attended a certain number of days. The students I tutored were from the inner city school. There were lots of cut programs and tutoring was an attempt at filling after-school gaps. This particular student, M., cried and cried. I ached right along with her. I can’t tell you that I’m the opinionated type that took sides either with the administration or her broken heart. I did not feel this was my cause nor my duty to make anything just, nor to eliminate her sadness by fighting for what she wanted. I just did my best to comfort her, seeing her process as a continuous initiation into all the trials that we ever, as humans in society, endure.
There are simply times that we are excluded, there are times that some students get rewarded more than others, there are times when peers are mean or just simply uninterested. I try to remember the kindergarteners that I worked with at the Navajo reservation in Tuba City, Arizona when I was assisting as a volunteer for my Spring break during undergrad. That’s a beautiful age when the kids surrounded each other, and also gave each other space. At least in this classroom, this was the situation. They seemed to understand when one child excluded himself from the group activities and instead focused intently on the magic of the wall map. They interpreted that he just wanted to do what he wanted to do. They didn’t seem to need to make an excuse for him in their minds or with each other, “he’s different.” The didn’t perceive him as “different” just doing what he wanted to do. When the activity ended, they all joined hands with him and me. That little child, F., I was told, had fetal alcohol syndrome. He was a little angel. I think he was perfect, but I do know how hard we work to accommodate and make an early intervention. Sadly, this student wasn’t attending school very often, and the limitations of being a teacher and pursuing that particular course any further felt rather unfulfilling. After all, I was an anthropology major, a participant-observer.
Eventually I worked with a group ESL students from Burma, and I enjoyed setting up their classroom and making worksheets, and really enjoyed talking with them – the goal was getting often getting them to speak in their non-native language. If I had continued working with children, I probably would have enjoyed the high school groups more – as for right now – the inner “teenager” aspect of me is very much alive. Those creative years when I would join my older friends at their colleges while I was still in high school. I would paint in my one friend’s studio; and we were wild. Yes, alcohol was involved. That kind of freedom to be wild; that rebellion in some sense, that was the best medicine for my creativity and my friendships. I still miss J. but she never liked technology, nor public attention. I’ve got a lot of ‘inner friends’ who represent all sorts of sides of me. I’m toasting to her right now…. wherever you are… you will always be loved; and I will always appreciate the wildness that you inspired in me! Somehow we were “old” before we were ever really young. I’ve been seeing a lot of memes that say, “Growing older, growing bolder.” It seems that getting bolder are acts of courage we all could use; and it doesn’t come from a place of naiveté, as much as it comes from place of having been wounded before, but moving forward anyways.
Luckily, life gives us plenty of opportunity for exploring all the ‘inners’ with all the ‘outers.’ Thanks to Sindy from Bluebutterliesandme for tagging me in this blog challenge, and I am grateful that you extended your dates. Thank you to Aquileanna from La Audacia de Aquiles: El Mundo Visible es Sólo un Pretexto for the Creative Blogger nomination! I honestly take this award as a challenge to get more creative, and to ‘live a little more fully.’ I am so humbled by you and yours. I mean that in the best way!! 😀
Here are my nominations for the Creative Blogger Award. Please note that if you are not “into” awards, that is fine, just please accept my appreciation for your creativity!!! Also, if you already have the award, then here’s another one, this time **from me, with love**!
With the nomination we thank the person that nominated us, add a logo to our posts, and nominate 10 bloggers of our choice and let them know that you nominated them. I think that when I link your blog, WP will ping you. I’m not 100% sure, though. Please please visit these blogs, if you have not already, and have happy times with these bloggers and their original content and uniqueness.
Fiesta Estrellas 
Congrats on your award sweetie! You are so creative and inspiring. You are really networking in a very groovy way lately and I admire your leadership moxie. 😉
I identify most with my inner teenager as her spirit was stronger that the younger versions of myself. Being wild was fun and very Aquarius!
I always enjoy learning more about you and it is a joy to know you.
love, lindalite
PS you chose some awesome blogs and a few I want to explore that are new to me.
Thank you, Linda ❤ I'm glad you like the blogs I chose for this nomination. As a person who formerly wasn't into awards, it's been fun participating. Aquarius likes to have their freedom, that's for sure. Something my S.Node and Rising Sign in Aquarius have to balance out. My favorite part about being an astrologer is the observing part. It really brings out the Buddhist in me. Actually that's my favorite Aquarius trait, too. Good thing each one of us has all the signs in our charts! Let's see what shows up! Thank you for showing up here 🙂 It makes me smile! xo Ka
Beautiful post and Childhood photographs…. You put a big smile on my face, dear Ka!. Hugs and best wishes! Aquileana ⭐
YAY! 😀 I am so glad……. Thank you for letting me do that! xoxo K
I know you touched the hearts of all the children you worked with. You never know the profound effects you have on people with the seeds that you plant. It’s nice you got to be wild as a teenager. I was so unhappy at that age. I got wild in my 20s and loved it!!
Congratulations on your creative blogger award! You ARE creative! Thank you for nominating me. I am truly honored and accept it with gratitude.
Namaste
Mary
Hi Mary, Thank you. It really means a lot to me to hear you say that about touching the hearts of all the children I worked with. It feels good to look at a letter that says, “Miss K. is the best: Dear Miss K. Thanks for every-thing you are the best tutor ever. I had a lot of fun with you. I will miss you. Sincerely, J.R.” Mary, I am not too unique in making an impact. This I know for sure, but it does mean a lot to me to have that two-way connection. When you wrote, “You never know the profound effects you have on people with the seeds that you plant.” It’s so true -having no clue there, whatsoever. I was just telling my husband, referred to here as EC, yesterday that the way I live now is, “I have no idea what the results are going to be.” I have a lot of ideas, but sometimes I actually have none. Either way, it’s just a transit. Namaste, Ka
P.S… I’m so glad you had fun in your 20s! I think I did as well.. (at times) but, it’s still that I’m not wanting to confess that they are a part of my past.
Hi Ka! What a wonderful post! My inner child has been on my mind with all this Leo energy! I haven’t been spending as much time as I’d like on my art, which definitely needs to change!
Thanks so, so much for the nomination! Your support and kind words made me very happy! 🙂
I will decline the award as I have a lot on my plate at the moment, but it does not take away the amazing feeling of being nominated! Again, thank you so very much! This was truly a wonderful gift! XOXOX
I wish you an amazing day, filled with lots of smiles (like you’ve made me smile!) ♡
Hey VL,
I live for making smiles! Very, very glad I made your smile. I totally honor your vibes. You know what? It was so busy for me with my Sun in 7th house Leo Solar return on the 7th of August. Then with this new moon conjunct my natal North Node in Leo, within a 1 degree orb. My natal Moon, Merc, and Venus all in the sensitive sign of Cancer were pretty overwhelmed when I got the nomination. Please Paint or whatever your art… make astro posts, eat yummy food! 🙂 Your nomination is yours for whenever, if ever… you want it. We can always respect a woman who says ‘enough’ 😀 Much love xoxox Ka
Ka! Happy belated birthday! I wish you a blessed and loved up year to come!
“We can always respect a woman who says ‘enough” I love that! Very powerful words!
I do feel sort of overwhelmed, but stuck in a way..Venus retrograde isn’t easy for me, with my Rising in Libra, and My Moon, Venus, and Mercury in Taurus! I’m grateful for this lovely New Moon!
Thanks so much for your love and light! Here I am, smiling again! 🙂 xoxox
Aw! Thank you 🙂 ::HUGS with gratitude:: It was a super-charged birthday with lots of newness and reconnecting. From what you write here, you have a lot of receptive/feminine energy in your chart, VL! You’ve had the transiting N.Node in your first house in Libra, giving you the self-directed energy that’s more of a masculine energy at the ascendant (Aries rules 1st house). Balancing that masculine/feminine is what we are most definitely doing leading up into the Mars/Venus conjunction in Leo at 15 (also my N. Sun’s degree) on 8/31! Sending positive vibes to you for Venus direct station on the 6th of September. The feminine Virgo all coming in here with Mercury and Jupiter, then the Sun co-joining Jupiter in Virgo, all forms a nice Earth trine to the Taurus energy in your chart, will hopefully bring it all into order and free you up a little bit – bit by bit 🙂 Good thing Venus rules both Libra & Taurus. Art ?! YES! Yay to smiles 😀 xo
Thank you SO much for that breakdown. I’m looking forward to Virgo season very much! My Mars is in Virgo as well. That Earth trine is fabulous! With so much going on…some help to get organized will be a welcome relief. Did I mention my Gemini Sun! Yep, I surely am the finger in every pie, all over the place, scatterbrain! Heheh.
How wonderful to have the Mars/Venus conjunction hitting your Natal Sun directly! WOW! That’s going to be spectacular!
Oh yes, September 6th! I’m counting the days! 🙂
You’re so warm and kind, Ka, I’m so glad to have met you! Thank you again! *Hugs*
How wonderful to see you receive this award! Your creativity is very inspiring, and I LOVE the idea of the Inner Child Challenge! Thank you so much for thinking of me, and I am honored to be nominated, though it may take time for me to fulfill my own presentations – I’m about to jump into another intensive Story A Day for 30 days challenge starting in September, but I do keep all my awards and work on them slowly as time permits.
May the Light always shine bright upon your hearth!
Fim
Hi Fim,
Please keep this award on hand! Your writing is so sincere and your recent post makes me laugh. I laugh because your style feels so light and still you carry a lot of depth in your delivery. The way you described your relationship to your reflection made me think of you doing a character study for a self-portrait. I love how you included the part where your smile has evolved into the familiar and welcome face of your mother. That spider you found, too… wow…Thank you for your warmth offered here. I wanted you to know that I enjoy seeing what you are developing at Quantum Hermit… Love, Ka
An inspired post, Ka… It was great to hear of your travels around the world and to envision your work with children, and am quite sure you left a trail of wide-eyed inspiration in your wake. Also, I really enjoyed hearing of the circle of friends, and felt a resonance with that haunting spectrum of friends and moments that, even if for just a short time, provided a beachhead from which to explore new facets of ourselves, to take shelter from the storm, to honor another piece of our own becoming. I am sure many of the names I have in my heart of those who inspired me, or gave me a hand when I needed it most, wouldn’t think of those moments of being of any real significance. But they were, and they are… as are these shares here, now…
Thank you…
Michael
Hi Michael,
Your words here keep speaking to me in response. Yes, these human touches mean so much: these exchanges, the refuge, the reflections of facets of ourselves in others, the sharing of knowledge, and just standing beside one another, big and small, near and fear, old and young. All types of possibilities join and lend us these moments as opportunities. Where would we be without them? I remember gazing up at the stars then, too, (Tuba City, AZ) and talking with a co-teacher friend of mine about binary star systems. How more than four-fifths of the single points of light we observe in the night sky are actually two or more stars orbiting together. That’s a lot more than I ever knew before she told me! Then there were the language lessons in a historical context: I met a native code-talker. Sadly, the last of the original 29 passed away in 2014. http://navajotimes.com/news/2014/0614/060414nez.php#.VdPqtUVeFRk I also communed with a Navajo/Hopi elder who gave me a little piece of weaving to take home with me. These are all exchanges. The magical thing is that ‘what’ was exchanged is not in the objects of exchange, nor in the knowledge, or words. It’s that intangible gift of Spirit; the best haunting we can imagine. Thank you so much for reading!!
Love, Ka
Pingback: The Trail Up the Mountain | Embracing Forever
I loved reading your story ka, seeds of love you have planted in many hearts… Lovely photos… Thanks for sharing, Barbara x
Thank you for reading, Barbara😍
Great exploration of the world of children (within and without). I appreciate your depth of caring for children. They need all the champions they can get. And we all need to play and let our inner child out to play more! blessings, Brad
Hi Brad, You said it, “[Children] need all the champions they can get.” Times spent with a child are always dear to my heart ❤ To our inner child, and more playfulness in all our lives! Thank you so much for reading, Ka
Thanks Ka.
the inner child
lives on
beautifully 🙂
🙂
Petals by the basket tossed my dear Ka. You know how I am with awards…..kind of like snail mail….still enjoy the tangible letter ….gives me time to savor and appreciate it. I am honored for the reinventionintention…my quirky little blog of being awesome. My day is even more special and to read of your work and interactions left me proud to know you…wishing I had been a child in your class then remembering we are all children and by learning from others, creating together, we fill this world with beautiful magic😇 you are an angel My friend. Thank you. Kim
Kim! You are so sweet. I was all blushy when I read your comment. Reinventionintention is such a special blog of living awesomeness. My connection is with you my friend. I love reading your words. Thank you for receiving my gesture of appreciation for your blogging presence, and *cheers* to reinventionintention’s creativity-receptivity!! Ka
Aww.. Hugs. ❤
Ka, lovely to reconnect with you…thanks for the visit and reminder which was long overdue. Ah yes, reclaiming the inner child and remembering with nostalgia those innocent days. That’s when we were truly free to be you and me. I have always felt that anyone who has the opportunity to work with children is truly blessed, And I feel it is a gift to connect with children as you have done…may you continue to be blessed and to share your gifts.
Hi Bev,
I feel like I can pause on this reflection for the rest of my life. I want to live in that spirit always, practice it, and allow it. I want people to feel that with me they can be whoever they need to be that helps them breathe a little easier. It was a wonderful gift to be a teacher of students with such diverse backgrounds and ages; because of it, I understand the two-way learning-process through teaching, and simultaneously while learning from teaching.
I’ve learned so much from observing students, watching their choices, seeing their parents choices. For example, I wish 3rd grader M.’s school bag wasn’t filled with *only* potato chips! I could only supply so many pencils from my own resources, because the school did not have them! Thank you, Dollar Tree! Those kids are so cute. It was easier to be patient, to be curious, to be available to them with the presence of the moment. In all honesty, I didn’t spend enough time teaching kids before life handed me other opportunities and challenges.
There’s this brilliant continuum of life, and it happens in this weaving of past-present-future. Like I said to Brad, time spent with a child is always dear to my heart. Thank you so much for visiting, Bev. So lovely to connect again ❤
Ka
Dear Ka, I’m happy to read this post and learn more about your inner child! She sounds pretty fun and spunky. 😉 As you know I’ve been exploring my own inner child these past few months…and she has a lot to say and share. They live inside of us, always – we just need to listen. Congratulations on the award too! I hope you’ve been having a wonderful August. ❤ Aleya
Hi Aleya,
Yes, spunky.. 🙂 You knew that already, didn’t you? Your current process is so in need of your nurturing. I can appreciate the depth of your desire to balance and be in harmony with both Self-and Family. I think you are doing a great job, Aleya! It’s one of those Universe assignments that feels like you are always touching the tip of an iceberg; there’s always more. At the core of it is love, love, love… Thank you so much for visiting! I’m so glad you’re finding some flow and connectivity as well in the middle of it of the process…*Whew* Much Love to You ❤ Sis,
Ka
Such a wonderful career to work alongside Children from such diverse backgrounds and I am sure they all of them benefited from your wonderful teacher skills.. And I am sure that child took great comfort that you comforted her..
Congratulations upon your award and I loved reading your Inner Child challenge.. I remember vividly the help of an English teacher who understood I needed encouragement.. She did this by introducing me to some of her own library books and got me hooked into reading.. Which in turn helped me enormously with my reading, spelling and writing skills.
Also I apologies for I came by before but had not the proper time to give attention in full to your post and intended to come straight back.. But didn’t..
Love your Make-over of your site also.. 🙂 I hope you enjoyed a Peaceful weekend… I had an enjoyable one..
Love and Blessings to you Ka.. Love Sue xxx ❤
Hi Sue,
Thank you so much for your congratulations on my award. I’m learning that it’s okay to receive public recognition for my efforts as well as my talents and gifts. I do regret not attending my college graduation. Maybe I was afraid of asking my family to come and visit me. I didn’t want to inconvenience them, it made me uncomfortable to think about how much effort that would require for them, since they didn’t visit me that much while I was at college; and it took years to build our relationships into much more comfortable ones.
Unworthiness is something that our inner children can struggle with. I think that’s why its easier to have compassion for others (as I did have a lot of sensitivity for my children). When we come from a place of empathy, understanding naturally follows.
I feel really fortunate to have had a couple of different careers already. My soul came into this life wanting for many diverse experiences, and to learn many skills, and to develop a process for learning itself. My life’s work is something that Spirit keeps informing about. It comes from within, and my etheric double is being shaped. My current activities-career make me feel grounded. I am precisely where i am meant to be.
Thanks for mentioning my blog’s make-over. It was in need of organization. I was just requiring the right chunk of time to commit to blog, and the right theme. I looked and looked ~ and sampled many. My original theme was stable for about 3 years of blogging. Then I fused around for about a year. I’m feeling happy with where I am at now. I’d say it actually came together on its own! ~finally!
Grateful for your presence here, Sue! Xox
.” My life’s work is something that Spirit keeps informing about. It comes from within,”
I agree Ka.. and you also mentioned about when we come from that place of empathy.. Often its hard to disconnect and appear dispassionate.. When all the time we are feeling deeply what others feel.. But I have also learnt over the years I have to learn to distinguish between what are my feelings and what energies I am absorbing from others.. Not always an easy task..
One of my Life Lessons is letting Go… And its often repetitive lessons have taught me I still need to learn more in my Letting Go.. 🙂 And valuing myself more as I would often feel ‘Unworthy’ in my low self esteem I brought with me from my childhood..
( I have tried several alternative to my theme Ka.. But as I tweaked this one so much, I now just change colours and my borders.. 🙂 .. Maybe another need to LET GO lol ) as I hang onto it 🙂 xxx
Hi Sue,
You said it so well, “Often its hard to disconnect and appear dispassionate..” Sometimes we just have to love from wherever we are. Whatever enables us to love more is good for all, loving ourselves while loving others, and really being kind to ourselves for what we can and cannot do. If we are taking on those vibes that don’t belong to us, then we just kindly release and disengage. There’s always so much going on that I find that hanging on can be difficult! Though I want to…so at the end of the day, I have to practice release. Life is a road full of connections and discoveries. Thank you so much for your reflections and presence here. xoxo Ka
🙂 And that can often be our trouble taking on the vibes that do not belong to us, as I know I often get pulled into other people’s stories.. But I am learning more to detach and release those emotions that are not my own.. xxx And likewise Ka.. thank you for being YOU.. x
Thank you ❤
Thank you for nominating STMND. That was very thoughtful of you and our whole community appreciates the extra exposure.
Absolutely! On my part it was basically a natural way to highlight a great blog that has a special essence.
Some roses for your inner child:
Oh, they are beautiful! She likes them very much! Just like the ones she’d see in her grandmother’s garden, and now adult me is growing – weather permitting! :):)
A perfectly lovely article, Ka, and one which reminds me just how much I draw on my granddaughters to reanimate my own inner child. I do so love escaping into imagination and fantasy with them, and just getting lost in the spontaneity of playacting, or in reading to them and animating the characters with silly or fearful voices. I miss my Border Collie, Nellie, who also would awaken something of that same sense within me, through all her craziness and eccentricities – Border Collies are renowned for that, as you may know. Blessings on the day, and with much gratitude for this delightful piece. Hariod