Sometimes I get lonely

Sometimes I get lonely, and I just realized it’s because it’s a natural response for me to disconnect from the “pain body” of the world. During tragedy, such as the recent event in Las Vegas, it’s a natural response for me that I acquired over time, to remove my shared energy field from that of the world. It’s self-protective, and it often works, but then the walls come down and I remember: here’s where I want to be, and maybe where I often, too, am; when I am more aware of it. This is from Thich Nhat Hanh’s Peace is Every Step.

Cookie of Childhood

“When I was four years old, my mother used to bring me a cookie every time she came home from the market. I always went to the front yard and took my time eating it, sometimes half an hour or forty-five minutes for one cookie. I would take a small bite and look up at the sky. Then I would touch the dog with my feet and take another small bite. I just enjoyed being there, with the sky, the earth, the bamboo thickets, the cat, the dog, the flowers. I was able to do that because I did not have much to worry about. I did not think of the future, I did not regret the past. I was entirely in the present moment, with my cookie, the dog, the bamboo thickets, the cat, and everything.”

May we always find our way back to peacefulness and connection.

Jiaogulan Tea Contemplations

spiritual-

-ity

tea
the lability    (word of the year in 1066)

of reality
of banality

of immortality.

ka malana ©2017

~ ~ ~

This morning I found a list of quotes/aphorisms that I once thought were important; as I sip my tea, I’m appreciating the fact that I have been consistent in things.

1). don’t throw out the baby with the bath water  🙂

My original journal entry had 123 quotes/aphorisms, but I am relaying the ones that I starred then. I am wondering to myself, would I elevate the same ones in importance or choose others at this time?

Next I’ll list the ones that I put a star next to, way back when. Unfortunately, I do not know who all of them are attributed to, so i welcome your help in the comments section, if you are inclined to do things like this, in this way.

-> “truth comes out of error more easily than out of confusion”

-> “neurotics build castles in the air, psychotics live in them”

-> “necessity has been with great truth called the mother of invention. some of the noblest exertions of the human mind have been set in motion by the necessity of satisfying the wants of the body. T. Robert Malthus, 1798

-> “i may disagree with what you have to say, but I shall defend, to the death, your right to say it.” Voltaire (1694-1778)

-> “you cannot depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.” Mark Twain

-> “i would rather be able to appreciate the things i cannot have than to have things I am not able to appreciate. Elbert Hubbard

-> “access to power must be confined to those who are not in love with it.” – Plato

-> “do not be too moral. You may cheat yourself out of much life. So aim above morality. be not simply good; be good for something.” – Henry David Thoreau

-> “memory is the greatest of artists, and effaces from your mind what is unnecessary”

-> “half the work that is done in the world is to make things appear what they are not. – E.R. Beadle

-> “the course of true anything does not run smooth” – Samuel Butler

-> “most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all.” – Dale Carnegie 

-> “never apologize for showing feeling, when you do so, you apologize for the truth.”  -Benajmin Disraeli

->  “he who has a thousand friends has not a friend to spare, and he who has one enemy will meet him everywhere. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

-> “the education of the will is the object of our existence” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

-> “time will explain it all. he is a talker, and needs no questioning before he speaks” – Euripides

-> “brevis esse laboro, obsurus fio.” (When I labor to be brief, I become obscure.) Horace from Ars Poetica.

-> “one cannot collect all the beautiful shells on the beach.” – Anne Morrow Lindbergh

-> “you don’t understand anything, unless you learn it more than one way. – Marvin Minsky

Sheri Munce – Hide and Seek

Munce-HideAndSeek-6003

-> “not everything is better for showing its face undisguised; and often silence is the wisest thing for a man to heed.” – Pindar

-> “we are never so happy or unhappy as we think.” -Francois duc la Rochefoucauld

-> “humor is the affectionate communication of insight” – Leo Rosten

-> “fanaticism consists of redoubling your efforts when you have forgotten your aim.” – George Santayana

-> “everyone takes the limits of his own vision for the limits of the world – Arthur Schopenhauer. 

-> “the mark of a good action is that it appears inevitable in retrospect” – Robert Louis Stevenson

-> “anyone can hold the helm when the sea is calm.”

-> “there is nothing so easy that becomes difficult when you do it reluctantly.”

-> “if you build castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put that foundation under them.” Henry David Thoreau

**I typed all these quotes out. It’s an exercise in absorbing their wisdom**

May your day be filled with many moments that you can enjoy!

Eve & Morn Meditations

death and Life are bookends
they hold the fort of knowledge
and destroy it, too.

fires light in the night
for courage and honest company
let us be real,

about our joy.

even though i am sad, I will not
lie, nor hide my joy. Those tears occupy
the same space.

Ka Malana©2017

Two videos for your thoughts, and a passage on “suffering” from How Can I Help? Stories and Reflections on Service, compiled by Ram Dass & Paul Gorman. My heart and thoughts go out to friends who have recently said goodbye to their loved ones who have in some way inspired and provided courage along the way.

Pillars of successful leaders, the knowledge that there is someone by our side.

This is a really good video about “What it is like, to be awake.” My favorite line from Adyashanti is “it’s never anything like you thought it would be…” Also, at 29 min in – “we reserve our greatest acts of ‘stupidity’ for *after* we’ve glimpsed the truth…” Adyhashanti says something like this: we never know whether or not we are embracing enlightment or carrying a bagel in bag with coffee in our hand. The truth is, we just don’t know. I personally ‘like’ the idea that we are doing one in the same: coffee, bagel + ultimate reality. 🙂  What do you think? Can you see any parallels in these two videos? What about the text below?

**I had not intended to post daily, but this is what I need from me right now. I hope you can benefit from this, too!!! These sharings are like the metabolites from my own work.

Being a long-term patient gives you a unique perspective on the world, and I have to laugh, although sometimes I must say it’s a little bittersweet.

Naturally, I’m seen as helpless. They have to lift me, move me, deal with my bowels and all. I don’t look very nice or smell very nice, I suppose. What I often see coming in the room is what you might call Central Casting for “General Hospital.”

Here comes Miss Aren’t-You-Looking-Better-Today. Which is funny to me, since it’s pretty clear I’m only barely holding my own. Enter stage left we have Nurse Wince. It’s hard for her to look at me. She’s afraid for her own mother, that’s she’ll end up like me. The doctors stride in; they should play “Pomp and Circumstance” over the PA system regularly. They’re examining my case. They find my case interesting. My visitors…. they usually fall into the soap opera too. And so do I, I suppose.

On it goes. You’d be surprised at the number of people who talk to you and can’t look you in the eye, even more than we normally can’t look each other in the eye. It’s like a parade of attitudes in here.

It’s funny; I laugh. I understand, I really do. I’m not a pretty picture. Their work is hard. But sometimes I just want to cry out, “Hello! Is anybody there? Hello? Hello?”

Fine-tuning

you are an instrument, she said,
self-tuning,
and self-correcting,
and self-regulating.

isn’t it neat how you get to
play differently
every day?

yes, some of this is painful,
but there’s a lot of joy, too.

there’s enough room in this
world for you, my dear.

you are allowed to exist.

don’t let anyone tell you
that you’re not an instrument,
that you are not beautifully
made of all the
sounds and all the colors,

and what you do here,

it matters.
it matters.

Navratri: Celebrations for the Goddess

Yesterday was the first day of the Navratri.

Artist 🎨 unknown
A stylized Pinterest version of another painting which can be found at the link here.

See Source for my original Navratri post.

Source: Navratri: Celebrations for the Goddess

More information:

The first set of nights are spent meditating upon the Divine Feminine in her powerful and destructive aspect known as Durga or Kali. We ask the goddess to help us identify and eliminate those aspects of our self that are not helpful, skillful, or productive, such as greed, envy, procrastination, laziness, lying, gossiping, etc. We also ask her to protect our spiritual practice from its many dangers and pitfalls.

The second set of nights are spent meditating upon the Divine Mother in her spiritual wealth-giving aspect know as Lakshmi. We ask the goddess to help us develop and maintain helpful qualities, such as patience, forgiveness, compassion, loving-kindness, and integrity.

The third set of nights are spent meditating upon the Divine Feminine in her spiritual wisdom-bestowing aspect known as Sarasvati. We ask the goddess to help us to achieve self-realization and understand universal truths such as our divine nature and the interconnectedness of living beings. The tenth day is spent offering gratitude to the Divine Mother and is spent celebrating in a state of sat-chit-ananda or truth-consciousness-bliss.

To Name These Days:

Prayers & Mantras
Chant the mantra “Om Bhavani” (“In the Name of the Divine Mother”) throughout the nine days.

Spiritual Practices
Practice a breathing meditation. As you inhale, say the quality you are trying to cultivate; as you exhale, the quality you are trying to let go of. For example, on the inhale, I might say, “Breathing in Compassion” and on the exhale I might say, “Breathing out Criticism.”

Personal Exporations
Take time each of the nine days or at least once every three days to focus on the three aspects of the divine feminine that are within you and the corresponding spiritual tasks.

Days 1 – 3: Focus on your inner power and strength. Write down the qualities or habits you wish to let go of. Pick one of these and practice letting go of it.

Days 4 – 6: Focus on your inner life-giving force and nurturer. Write down the qualities or habits you wish to cultivate. Pick one of these and practice incorporating it.

Days 7 – 9: Focus on your inner wisdom and guide. Write down the spiritual teachings you wish to learn or better understand. Pick one and read an inspiring book or article about it.

Written by Ami Bhalodkar

Productive Learning Process: The Urban Garden

I managed to get a picture of our green peppers which grew on our TowerGarden. Once again, I am surprised by their size, and the quality of their taste – but most surprised that they didn’t end up reaching this stage until I was ignoring my garden for a while. Cultivation sometimes requires leaving things […]

via Our Green Peppers — Urban Towergarden

We are not free from others’ misperceptions

We are not free from others’ projections of us –
nor the collective power of social organization, which shapes
our policies, and what’s available – what’s on the table to be chosen.

In fact, we are exactly defined by how others see
us, regardless if what they see is an extension of
themselves, even within a collective. We live falsely from the onset,
by no device of our own; In effect, we are born to be misunderstood.

The beauty in this situation is
that whether or not anyone realizes ‘what’ really
belongs to ‘whom,’ we all are involved in the healing process, of
these projections and the role-assignments that are forged either because of them or despite them. We build a community, we form alliances; we courageously listen to others.

How does justice fit into this?

In the trial system, the people in the courtroom,
their thoughts and the lawyer’s arguments, work on the community
as a whole. The jury deliberates. People soul search. We hope that each voice gets heard, and that justice is served through the collective.
Our very idea of justice is based on the system of the collective. But what is at the core of that?

Community/Collective is healing, there is no separation from community. That is, it needs to heal, if it is to function properly. That is if by properly, we mean all things: prosperously, productively, healthfully. When we meaningfully ask for truth and reconciliation, we mean all things.

The inner world may not reflect the outer world, but the outer world certainly develops because of the individuals. It takes the individual to rise up and be heard in order to and for the collective/community to transform. This means we each must stand up for ourselves, by seeking inwardly that truth and reconciliation. Meanwhile, the outer world is reflecting where we need to serve this peace-making. This practice is a risk that we take, for the betterment of our neighbors. We make ourselves vulnerable when we offer our unique and untested ideas, but we do it in service to the greater good.

We are all unique. Our perspective need not follow along lines of
all those who have gone before us (or surround us), while each individual is touched by all he/she/it (general neutral) experiences. We need not look to the members of the group who wield the most social power, for we have our own individual sovereignties.

The world is real and yet it is at the same time only viewable through the lens of self. Each one’s relationship to the self. If one’s relationship with oneself is golden, then one can do great things in the world – because the impressions that the world places upon it, don’t scratch its surface, but just clear the veil to seeing that there is light. There is love. There is peace. We can clear this. We can do it, each of us.

For those who experience loss, may something be gained.

Maui inspired print

I wasn’t planning on sharing this painting, or at least yet. I made it as a fun print, with kid’s washable paint. It’s on wood. I like the blank spots, for now.  Not worrying about being a “serious” painter – I like that every time I sit down to make some art, or I make art on the fly – it’s for a different reason, season, need, purpose. Sometimes I study an object, sometimes I just want to have fun. That’s what this was. Also, I’m not pigeon-holing it into “something” or needing to be defined. I’m letting it live on its own.

That said, I am sad to hear today about a colleague’s artwork being stolen. I’m angry. I’d like to keep the details private but I wanted to offer up my “make it easier” coloring in honor of this loss and ask that the artwork be returned to the owner it was gifted to and so that the work can continue to heal and make its offerings on the wall where it was originally set.

Scorpio as a sign in general tends to guard that 8th house of losses and gains. We are in the midst of the full moon with the nodes changing into Leo/N.Node and Aquarius/S.Node. I am a big believer that we don’t lose anything, only the physical form. I can only imagine how much of a blow it was to the creator of the artwork – with the art’s intention to heal and provide.  This is the human condition, no one is free from loss. May this person, and all involved, experience a full restoration.

Taurus moon burst, touching, new

i returned home to my roses bursting –
opened by more than mere grace
an abundance of nature, holding space

nature held place for you,
and for me
at home, together

while we healed and learned
and read books, Reikied over everything
while the highest light guided
and nature divided
the space opened and closed
into the shapes of waterfalls

different edges and

how when painting everything is seen first
as a geometric shape
and then
fleshed out,
drawn, stretched, applied,
revealed as nuance,

light shining
light shimmering

and the green gushing
clay cliffs
on the road to Hana
twisted
forming snapshots – would keep an
editor busy for hours,

but i don’t have any reason
to edit

not today
not when more work is around the bend
and poems to be written
and people to see.

blogs to visit
and new names to learn, books to read
at a pace that, that only mercury retrograde
would allow.

Taurus was New, sculpting my memories
of sound, art
in darkness,
and each thing I ever made

came back to life.

the way the sun rises
the poetry is good
because life is written in it.

and the music playing is always the right song.

In a new era: one leader shows ‘A’ way hOMe

Wishing everyone a fine Sunday. This video moves me deeply.

Perhaps you might enjoy this short video where Morgan Freeman interviews His Holiness the 17th Karmapa, Ogyen Trinley Dorje, as much I have. This man is one of my leaders (Karmapa – but Morgan Freeman is pretty standup, too), my ‘wayshowers,’ and I’m so proud to say it. He’s very ordinary. That’s what I adore about him. He’s also very extraordinary. Keep your eyes out for him. Though he is young, at 31, he embodies the transmissions from the former 16 Karmapas. He is a walking lineage and he is, I believe, a vast “energy holder” for our new era.

There is no winning hand

Each day
I look down at my hands
and make sure
I’ve emptied them.

Otherwise, they can’t be
filled, and sometimes
I get thirsty, and need to
make a cup.

For wisdom.

Maybe tonight we can
just not talk, but
just sit beside each
other, silently rooting
for one another.

Silently saying, “Go, go, you can
do it.” Your hands are open,
and you are ready to
receive,
and all the Universe will
silently flood in,

no one will know it, but it’s
already happened.

Roman Holiday – Italian Subway Graffiti

I probably shouldn’t be admitting this on my blog, but I’m not a very good storyteller. I want to just show up and say, “It was magical- THE END,” and then quietly sit down, without a whole lot of rigamarole, so that I can go onto my next adventure. That being said, the other issue with telling the tale, is that… it’ll get re-framed as less awesome than it really was. My words and my pictures cannot do justice to my experiences. Maybe that will change, but today it is the same. The actual experience is the best, and well… that’s really all I can say. Enough excuses and disclaimers (but I needed to be a little bit real about my awkwardness and include them)!  Commencing with the rest…

The title of my post: “Roman Holiday” was inspired by Trini over at Pathways to Spirit, a few months ago she posted about this movie, and we’d just returned from Rome, so I wanted to extend the fun and watched this fun movie with Audrey Hepburn. At first, I was going to title, “Rome was like Home.” Really, maybe I’ll just start with the title last, next time.

Usually words just flow. 

Let’s start with some subway scene photos. Very real. Oh, and an Italian snack machine, because for all adventures, snacks play a role.

ITSubway_FrontIThorizontalcarManReadingonSubwayITsubway_relaxedTaggedthetrainwithmyownnameITSnacks

Next up…. a short story written in college, entirely unrelated to anything…

Reflection #1 Entrepreneur; Heart Math; mer. Retro

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Side note: I plugged in my HeartMath device and decided to have looksie at my heart’s coherence while I write. This is my personal medical information that I do not feel like disclosing; and therefore, I won’t, unless I change my mind. I take my own personal information very seriously. Each person is entitled to their privacy and proper respect of their information. This is one reason why I do not discuss about my clients, patients, etc. on my blog or anywhere at all. I know there are people who are clever at discussing without names, etc, but I won’t even get close to that; to me that is a risk I am unwilling to take. Second side note: An EmWave device (by Heart Math) is an excellent tool for the goal-oriented meditator. The device can supply very helpful feedback about what is happening during your meditation ~ whatever style or type of practice you choose!(except the one w/out goals)

Today’s reflection is from a random passage reading. This is a technique known as bibliomancy. If you google it, as I have done, just to be sure I am representing it correctly (or in accordance with the current internet Gods), most likely you will get this:

Bibliomancy is the practice of seeking spiritual insight by selecting a random passage from a Holy Book. Bibliomancy is divination using a book, sometimes a bible is used.”

I consider everything is sacred. So this book I got back in 2010, which is absolutely amazing FOR people who ARE looking for direction in their lives. I highly recommend it; it’s perfect for entrepreneurs like us. People who are self-employed, people who are learning to become self-employed. This book helped me find my way into my current path. I’d like to say it was a nudge to write a blog but that came from Keen.com and my friend Kathleen, aka. Deva Vidya who told me about keen.com, which got me thinking about starting my services up there. While she said nothing about a blog, she was an inspiration to me by simply being a first follower of my blog.

Since then, I was “graduated” to more schooling and a different framework for incorporating what I do; who I am; “healer,” etc. Plus, what I am doing now is really for me. Yes, just for me 🙂 I needle myself!

Without further ado…

Zen and the Art of Making A Living: A practical Guide to Creative Career Design, 2010, e.d. by Laurence G. Boldt

I have taken the time of transcribing a small passage here below in the interest that the author of this work get the credit.

p. 207  How Many Do you Want to Reach and How Deeply?

When contemplating your life’s work, consider the scope of the impact you want to make. Is the change or benefit you want to make at the level of the individual, family, community, nation, or planet? How many lives do you want to reach and at what level of depth? The quality of depth of the impact that you make upon others can be as important as the breadth of your impact. For example, an elementary school teacher may profoundly impact the twenty-five students that she teaches each day for a year. Her students will grow up to be better people and to give more to the world because of her effort and love.

You may have heard it said that effectiveness is a matter of doing the right things, and efficiency is doing things right. Your work purpose reflects what you think are the right things to do. It is the why-you-do that proceeds the how-to-do. If you have a strong enough why, you will figure out the how. When we continue to act on and into purpose, the results have a way of taking care of themselves, even as when we care for a tree, the fruit takes care of itself. Thoreau said, “Be not simply good– be good for something.” Discover what you are good for! Look within your heart and out upon the world. Look at how much the world needs your love and at how much you want to give it. Then determine to live your life on purpose, to play your part as it was meant to be played.

And whosoever of you will be the Chiefest, Shall be the servant of all.   Mark 10:44

Tomorrow I’ve got a plane to catch, and I’m not quite ready. I’m not worried about it because, well, I’ve always survived. I have more to share than I have time for, and on more than one topic, or in one type of style, voice, or format. Heck, I have lots of writing to do for me, and just for me. I’ve got authors I’d like to share about, etc. That’s right! I want to brag about my friends to you, my friends. I will do my best to make time for you – as I always do. Also, I might need your support. I need to write a book of poems. How do I do it? Where do I start? Are my poems good enough?  Who wants to be my editor? I’m kind of picky about that one because I am adamant about leaving creative errors and challenging peoples’ ideas of what constitutes, “good,” “marketable,” “worthy.”

I’m taking you all with me as best I can, for I love you, and of course, we have always been connected ~ as I am following you. So be my leader. Do it. Show me the way.

Astrology blurb

I have natal Mercury sextile Saturn [and Mercury trine Uranus]; and I will tell you, from my experience, I always produce more creative output around the Mercury retrograde cycles. It’s so cool!  Will I regret it later? I don’t know, that’s later’s problem. I love Mercury Retrograde! I’m not the kind of astrologer that fears it, until it pisses me off, then I am. But, I bounce back, just like planes do! Here’s to Mercury retrograde in Taurus: May all your (HE)ART be rewarding in the physical, and let this retrograde cycle (Mercury in Taurus) be the one to help you learn how to win more for everyone, and/or to keep at it in the best way! Success is all there really is…even failure is success.

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Images from stock images and playbuzz.com
Author: Ka Malana