Building my altar to existence, designing the playhouse of my environment, and just bringing more presence and awareness into my life with every breath.
*Welcome*
encouraging, providing,
supporting, showing up
feeling bad when I don’t.
never missing a birthday greeting,
remembering every detail,
to prove my love.
Yes, I am listening…
Today, friendship found me;
my love was felt,
And, it was returned.
It felt like the way Love feels
without any need to prove
itself.
Full acceptance, Presence.
Today I didn’t have to chase
after friendship,
and show my toys,
Try to entice a friend
to stick around.
I’ll be real good to you!
You can tell me all your secrets!
You can trust me!
Today, friendship found me,
Simply because I wasn’t in need –
no one was,
in need of anything.
And, no one was trying to
confide in me, offer me their services,
or ask me to fix anything.
No one was trying to transact.
All was already provided.
Let’t just relax and enjoy ourselves..
**There was a goldendoodle who presented in the clinic last week (not the one who was being treated; the puppy gnawed on a chair but didn’t bark) but the owner brought in the puppy. Growing up, my first friend was my sister dog: Maggie. We were toddlers together.
“Damiel: It’s great to live by the spirit, to testify day by day for eternity, only what’s spiritual in people’s minds. But sometimes I’m fed up with my spiritual existence. Instead of forever hovering above I’d like to feel a weight grow in me to end the infinity and to tie me to earth. I’d like, at each step, each gust of wind, to be able to say “Now.” Now and now” and no longer “forever” and “for eternity.” To sit at an empty place at a card table and be greeted, even by a nod. Every time we participated, it was a pretense. Wrestling with one, allowing a hip to be put out in pretense, catching a fish in pretense, in pretense sitting at tables, drinking and eating in pretense. Having lambs roasted and wine served in the tents out there in the desert, only in pretense. No, I don’t have to beget a child or plant a tree but it would be rather nice coming home after a long day to feed the cat, like Philip Marlowe, to have a fever and blackended fingers from the newspaper, to be excited not only by the mind but, at last, by a meal, by the line of a neck by an ear. To lie! Through one’s teeth. As you’re walking, to feel your bones moving along. At last to guess, instead of always knowing. To be able to say “ah” and “oh” and “hey” instead of “yea” and “amen.”
Excerpt from the movie, Wings of Desire, directed by Wim Wenders. In the movie, the angel wants to experience the physical world.
The angel Damian falls in love with a lonely trapeze artist…
When i was in elementary school, I wrote this poem. It was chosen and published in the school’s annual publication. The theme for the assignment was “Amusement Park.”
a single leaf falls
from autumn’s hour,
and decorates the parking lot floor,
from here we are swept into another world
Tracing the lines of the leaf to the contours of the wall,
a painted circle on the wall emerges.
We feel the universe begin to sparkle, and to share her secrets.
“gravity propagates at the speed of light”
Einstein was right!
I read it in a new article…
~
Purple and orange sunset swirl
the light goes down like a sunken pearl
oncoming night, fills us with delight
dreams, upon freer nite
as real as an untethered kite.
fantastic and true, as my maple spiced beverage!
Drowning in full chromatic hue…
“If we represent knowledge as a tree, we know that things that are divided are yet connected. We know that to observe the divisions and ignore the connections is to destroy the tree.”
– Wendell Berry
What I enjoy about this photograph is the way the patterns of light and shadow blend the tree into its environment. It’s as if the subject is the dance of light and not the tree itself. The background and the foreground of the image contrast, where in the foreground the shape of the leaves are where the light comes in. It is as if the light is projecting negative space. While in the background, the leaves are positive and dark – much like a yin-yang (Tai Qi). Each component contains the other. I enjoy the texture and the movement of this image, and how the patterns of light and dark unify the entire image. It’s as if the roots are moving toward the viewer, inviting the viewer into a meaningfully, rooted experience.
infinite sunrise
that’s what you are,
an eternal idea
a fountain of radiance
burning our skylines
dazzling our eyes
with sunsets,
in colorful shows
how we revolve around your
furnace and experience
in 8 min and 20 sec,
your Fresh light
on this day and many
others, I️ am but a weak
glimmer of anxious hope
turned to facing you for
your eternal spirit,
your renewing compassion
I️ am but a pale face in the
morning without your fun
sun to shine upon
and animate this day into
a knot of flame to become
a meaningfully regular burn of
time
When you notice that I am posting even more frequently in November (hopefully). You’ll see that you, too, can join in. I will be participating in Nano Poblano, “the World’s Least Official Blog-Everyday-November Challenge.” Nothing gets me motivated like something that isn’t officially official-official, and really has the spirit of community, teamdom, and freedom. We all want to have fun. Here’s the official link. Especially if you are already a regular every day blogger, and want to reach more people, and participate more as well – go sign up!
Nothing says “potential over-commitment” like Jupiter conjunct Sun in Scorpio – so I thought it’d be a great time (or worst time) to take a deep dive. You get it, folks, I decided to go for the swim! Isn’t it exciting!? That said, considering my away-from-the-blog work/life/family balance, it should be an equally busy season off-blog. My throat already feels scratchy and my lymph nodes feel swollen, so why don’t we do it?! I’m gonna enjoy this, or at least enjoy trying! Oh, and the self-care… that’ll happen. 🙂
Blogging, for me, brings together my favorite things art, celebration, exploration, empowerment, and meditation, and growing together. I need the calm to balance the excitement. I need the bland to balance the spicy. I need the deep-discussions to balance the light-hearted whimsy. I need my own commitment to my writing/art/astro/photography space getting out there, and I need it to be okay when I don’t make it out the gate, or I just hide under the blankets.
This is my home beyond me. This is where I live, and I intend to keep decorating, or louse it up, whatever is my choice. If you stick around for my posts, I thank you all in advance for supporting me and my self-expression, as it ebbs and flows, changes and grows.
This image above is a photograph I’ve taken from an image in the book: Astrology, Magic, and Alchemy. The painting is called The Planet Saturn. It’s a miniature from De Sphaera, 15th century. Modena, Biblioteca Estense.
In the image can be seen the dual rulership of Saturn, the waterbearer image (Aquarius) and the goat 🐐 (Capricorn). In the image, Saturn seems to be represented as a man, carrying a sickle and also a cane, as if to indicate old age.
Perhaps as depicted in the image, the power over death, and that for a long life, is in our own hands – if only we are to realize it. Yet most of us gaze outwardly with fear, understandably. Often the power seems beyond us. This begs the question for a more nuanced stance, and a depth of inquiry that rarely ceases.
Since Jupiter has moved into the sign of Scorpio, many of us are wondering what it means – what it means for us individually. The image above is from a painting called Jupiter. It is a detail. It is by Jacopo Zucchi; Rome, Palazzo Rucellai, vault of Galleria.
In the image above we have Jupiter’s dual rulership represented, Sagittarius on the bottom left, and Pisces on the bottom right.
Are our heart’s asking for justice? How can we be more judiciously loving with ourselves?
Is there a being whose highest authority we can appeal to, who will listen to our woes, our trials and tribulations? A being more intimate than the one we all are connected to in our hearts? What about the peace within our own hearts?
This New Moon in Libra is juicy and new – and it has a lot of energy to contribute to our relationships. Take a moment and be present with who you are today, and in loving, full acceptance, say: “yay!” I am so grateful to share this space with all of you!
Ka Malana Photography ©2017
Tracing the lines of the leaf to the contours of the wall,
Photography: Ka Malana ©2017
Fiesta Estrellas 
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