Leaf me here

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© 2017 Ka Malana, Photography

“In Borneo, there are palm trees that walk on their high roots. Slowly, with effort, they lift one leg then another. I would like to join that stilted transmigration, To feel my own skin vertical as theirs: An ant-road, a highway for beetles. I would like not minding, whatever travels my heart. To follow it all the way into leaf-form, bark-furl, root-touch, And then keep walking, Unimaginably further.”  – Jane Hirshfield, from the poem, Metempsychosis.

Completed another chapter,
turned another corner,
met another pause;
With time, already filling herself,
there is more color
in my new schedule,
and a bit more peace, bliss

Please join me at Urbantowergarden.wordpress.com this Spring. I’ll be here, too ~ musing & amusing xo Ka

Urban Garden Grows

I awoke to a message on UrbanTowergarden that reminded me that I had nearly forgotten to share some of what’s growing here. I was more carried away with the photography than anything.

Ka Malana - Fiestaestrellas.com's avatarUrban Towergarden

We are looking forward to seeing to see what our spring gardening yields this year. After the strawberry issue, and a very unusual winter, we returned to the growing on the tower. I added fresh chives to my breakfast this morning. I love being able to forage from my tower. An added benefit of  my tower is that sitting outside to eat my morning breakfast allows to me to enjoy the water sounds from the fountain that recycles the water in the tower, showering the plants in intervals.

My rose bush has buds all over it, and the mint is making a comeback as it always does. I always feel at home when I have fresh mint growing in my garden.

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Vernal Equinox – Springin’ it!

Today as I was drawing up the astrological chart for the Vernal Equinox, I was running into all sorts of snags in terms of saving the chart and technological stuff. So, I had to sit myself down and slow down. I recalled back to all the progress I made with my em-Wave heart coherence the day before, and I was thinking about how I practice astrology and what I can contribute. Often times when we have a Full moon, or a New Moon or another punctuated seasonal event, we often embellish (as a culture) the sign that the Sun is in. Now, the Sun is special to me, sure (as a Leo), but in reality, what we are seeing is a BALANCE of signs and energies at any given moment. I say this because my natal Sun is in Libra’s house. So, balance is incredibly important to me, as we perceive it. I also have a tendency to believe in an inherent and natural balance that happens on its own, the way matter settles under gravity.

We have so many planets in Aries right now, and so it’s easy (understatement) to get carried away. I know I have been ~ so much creativity, there’s the gentle kick-back though and reminder for me, today, to just ‘be receptive’ and settle into some of this exuberance. Or, let the exuberance settle into me. There’s this excitement of what is to come during this time of the year – what has been growing and what might be around the corner waiting to be planted. Nevertheless, there is also this sense of ordinariness that creeps in and reminds me, we faithfully celebrate the turn of the seasons every year. If we didn’t, I don’t believe that we would be upsetting the Gods/Goddess/or Nature itself.

Back to the point about balance: I like to look at signs in “‘2’s.” Like a virtual see-saw, with a central pivot. I do not focus all my energy on the one spotlight sign: Aries!  There’s a natural focus on Aries right now. So, I look to Libra. Do you follow me? Once I spring, there’s gotta be the opposite movement, “the catch.”  I want my virtual see-saw to be nice and chill though, so there’s gotta be a central focus – between the two. But in balancing, just like a bicycle, I have to subtly pivot to both sides, one at a time.

A few years ago I did trapeze with my husband for the very first (and only) time. I’m going to use that as my metaphor. The Aries energy was helping me climb up that pole and reach the heights that I was reaching, but that was only the beginning. I needed the “will to move.” What I also needed was the listening ears for the instructions about how to hold my hands, and what to do when the trapeze bar came my way. I could see the net, yes, but when you are up-high, you don’t really calculate how much spring is in that net that helps catch you if you fall. There’s more.  I didn’t know there was more until I was listening to the directions. I was told how to position my hands so that I would be ready for the catch. That’s right. Not only did I have to catch the bar, and then put up my knees and let go of my hands, my final fete was to open my hands and allow myself to be caught. That part was easy, but it was also tricky; it required one extra moment of acceptance, receptivity.

So, Libra is needed – to balance – the Aries energy.

During this Vernal Equinox, what are you catching? What’s in your net? What are you listening to? How will you bounce if you fall? Will you make ‘the catch’ and allow yourself to ‘be caught’? How can you balance your receptivity to others with your will to live and do and be so freely?

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Water-falling buckets

i am more than happy
to be a cog in this wheel
as one who passes that baton
that has already been passed
by so many of
my teammates,
to so many of my
teammates.

i don’t need to invent anything,
or repackage something else.

and i am happy to be
one who doesn’t win the race often,
or ever, but gets to
make it to the show, serendipitously
through others,
on most days. And when i don’t,
i know – that everything doesn’t rest on me.

the world will turn even without me,
but loves me anyways.

i am more than happy
to be one of this many
of this many that is one,

breathing allows me to be
a precious, tiny cog in this wheel
that turns like water-falling buckets,
yeah, that.

there’s a central axis that can’t be
pointed at.

right now there are so many baskets
opening with the harvest of
sitting dormant all through the winter;

the hardest work done,
was no work at all.

 

Stop

even if i wanted to
i couldn’t stop falling
hopelessly in love
with
each sound that i
hear
or the texture of your
fingertips
as they make a point,
acting as a second face
annotating
their contours, and giving away
who you are
when you elevate a thought
in your mind

or quickly
or slowly

move on to the part
where you enjoy laughing
in the story.

even if i wanted to
i couldn’t become unallergic
to the fluffiest cutest most self-complete
creatures on earth.

but i strangely and unapologetically
relish the event where i’m invited to
suffer this love at someone’s house,
with their cat/s.

I can vicariously enjoy
the gift of pictures.

even if i wanted to
i couldn’t not be afraid.
of each thing i say or do,

how will it effect things, people, butterflies,
or will my actions do nothing at all?

If you only knew what momentum’s
edge has, you’d know that even
if I wanted to, i couldn’t do so
many things, unless they are
‘right’ they felt ‘right’ they
are, me, bringing –> you some “flowers,”
in some way.

i want to help deliver
these moments that make you
go ‘Oh’ and ‘Yeahhhh’
or, ‘i see,’ ‘hmmm.’

even if i wanted to, i couldn’t not
live, just a little bit more
every day.

to live outside this bubble,
is where exactly i am,
and it’s a difficult place to describe,
it’s pointless, literally, figuratively…

i couldn’t not read the news today.

this land, the earth, our home,
i couldn’t help loving even if you
told me, everything is boloney
and all the talking heads are all really
extemporaneous and perhaps
slightly more honest and candid
because of that.

Because if all this is prepared, who did
the script writing, created the scenery,
set the extremes to ‘high’ ?

even if i wanted to,
i couldn’t fast-forward to the part
of the story where everything is perfect
and everyone sees eye-to-eye –
and all the sickness in the world has been
cured, but if i wanted to,

i can stop everything – and look
at where there are no problems, nothing to
sort, no mission to achieve, not a single angle
to behold.

if i wanted to, i could work on this ‘place’
and widen it, and see what its got to share with
me.

i could return to the sounds that i
couldn’t stop falling in love with,
even if i wanted to, silence…

it contains all of this.

6th Blog Year ~ Grateful

wordcloudFiestaestrellas.com has been active for 6 years! Blog posts have ranged from subjects in art, shamanism, astrology, reiki, poetry, short fiction, gratitude, survival, planetary love, trees and friendship. Blogging has been the hug (hub – last word was a typo I thought I’d keep!) of wonderful new friendships and connections, with lots of sharing, growing, and camaraderie throughout the years. It’s been a place to celebrate the magic and mystery of creation.

Just 6 years ago, before a life-changing trip to Kauai (and following 4 years of radical personal change), and a resultant development along my shamanic path as a then solo practitioner (with lifelong study of astrology and intermittent art-making in various media), fiestaestrellas.com was born! There was all the excitement of Uranus having just entered Aries, and the inspiration hit: begin this blog! I was working with children and tutoring high school refugee students in English around that time. I remember so fondly our Valentine’s Day celebration the month prior. Seeing the culmination in action!

6 is the number of this blogger’s life path. It is the union of 3 and 3. It is the path of the healer-nurturer, while 33 is that of a Master teacher. To me this is the guidance from the way. I receive the guidance ‘on the way,’ as I am with ‘the dao’ and inseparable from it. Scholars may remember that Dao once written as “Tao.” Even the ancient terms are re-written and from this new expressions are given to the value of the old.

Old and New collide here in the Blogland of “celebration of stars,” Fiestaestrellas, and make something all together different, timeless, and hopefully beautiful. Because who doesn’t need a decent measure of hope and beauty?

Uranus will change signs into Taurus in 2018 (a time I am very much looking forward to!), and with that time another foundation will be laid here, as the endurance will be a sure measure of the creative output and willingness to move with Spirit – while having a good time – will be and is the reason and why!

As Venus currently retrogrades in Aries and then into Pisces – inspirational (Aries) value (Venus) is under review, introverted, re-claimed, re-beautified, and/or released. What I value in this moment is to recollect the gentle energy of receptivity, the sculpted and painted form of love and living love through my values, exchanges, and relationships. The poetry of the way life moves, in true acceptance. Impressions and general affinities – the light touch of the sensory perceptions and those of the beyond – are embraced, valued.

Mahalo ~ Mahalo ~ Mahalo ❤

In honor of this time, I have a song I want to play, a song that gently repeats itself in my life practice. It is Tara’s mantra: White Tara (some will say Green Tara). While the mantra has such meaning of itself, this particular vocalist really brings the harmony to my ears as I experience it, and into the song of the meditation, offering, peace.   Aloha ❤

Post update: The wonderful photo above in the shape of a wireless signal, was inspired by one of my blogging friends, Ra @ Rarasaur: In this blog post, she showed us where to get a nifty design online. The image was sitting in my downloads folder until I saw it while cleaning.

Afternoon Exercise

every face today has a smile
eye contact and a
story telling.

“today is my birthday,” he
says. “I’m 24.” I can hear
It in his voice – he is
grateful to be alive.

each year gets more precious

This dog named Ranger, who reminds me of Venus, both black labs, both friendly. One has passed on. Ranger is
panting happily, here and now.

All with a meet and greet – and just now I loOk up and deeply into a woman’s eyes.

Hello! We say It at the same time. Her visor is a good idea. I replace my sunglasses and see more dogs.

They are as happy as I for California rain and shine.

Two more dogs go by, and soon I’m back to my work.

The women who pass me say,
“Recess is sacred”

I add: thank you for sharing your dogs 🐶

Following your own path; Freedom is found in Courage

Recently I finished reading a book by Jeremiah Hues called, “The Law of Propulsion.” Within it he shared his life work and also an invitation to the reader to meet with him in person to continue the work, as well as one’s own personal investigations. I met Jeremiah a few years ago in the spirit of common interests and friendships. He was conducting his thought experiments at the time, and also expanding his work. It’s very inspiring to be with people who are working on their projects and really coming into and sharing their life’s work. There’s an openness to sharing, and there’s also an invitation for more. Each person has their own focus, their sacred attention. Sometimes, for a time, our interests may overlap and our inquiry may be along the same lines, even our goals; other times, we need to fly free and into the unknown. We need to explore a bit on our own.

I am excited for people who decide to become authors. Having recently embarked on this journey myself, I can honestly say: doing it was better than imagining it. It opens up new worlds! Also, you never know who will be interested, and who will buy your book! Sometimes the people who you most admire might be your fastest, quickest customers. Who knows? What else is possible?

On Flying

Interestingly, after some time at the air and space museum, I was reflecting on the words of the flight pilot Amelia Earhart – the first female aviator to fly solo across the Atlantic Ocean.

“Courage is the price that life exacts for granting peace. The soul that knows it not, knows no release from little things.” 

As we come into the full moon in Leo on the 10th of February for some, and themes of Aquarius and Leo abound, we seek to balance what is internal with what is external: what is about “the group think” and the community consciousness, consensus; and what is in “the content” of the “still small voice.” Even astrology is interpreted differently among astrologers, based on personal experiences and biases (and charts) (and chart systems and house divisions, etc etc). Same pie, different cuts.

I really don’t know a person on the planet that has not been exposed to the existence of astrology, and has not at least become a little bit aware of what is said about their sun sign, often in a dual way, the “pros and cons.” In this way, we are all astrologers. We are all (dual) thinkers. We are all open to the awareness of contrast and to the continued study of astrology, and the question of illumination in unity: what is its meaning and purpose, and role in our lives (if any).  Hopefully, we also have access to seeing our divine-mundane canopy as well, the real twinkling stars out there, exploding with gas and spectra: conveying without words, frequency and sometimes a detectable presence! I’m thinking of a distant nebulae right now where it hasn’t even been discovered or yet named! How free is that nebulae!?

Historically, astrology has been focused on celebrities and interpreting the actions of “the outside” world – politics, you name it, offering prophecies and speculations. I enjoy it as that, but even moreso as a tool for introspection. Most astrologers see astrology as a tool for enlightening and opening the mind and consciousness. A tool for recognizing biases and for seeing how each sign is a part of our chart! No escapees!

Fame has often been linked with Leo, but I have a different understanding for Leo – my sun sign in the tropical zodiac, with Aquarius on the S. Node and also Ascending. Because fame always sounded awful to me. Leo calls us to be with the courage of who we are. Leo and Aquarius work in harmony when best. They are opposite signs, but they demonstrate two aspects of the same coin. What they point to is a fulcrum- a place where balance is not only likely, but necessary, for peace within wholeness. These are two fixed signs, different perspectives!

We all can conduct our experiments and come up with what is meaningful to each of us. One of my favorite excerpts from Jeremiah’s book is from the section called, “Why Knowing the Knower?,”

The quality of knowing your knower adds to your highest self. It’s a tool that accesses deeper understandings as a resource.

Because your kinesthetic/deep Knower nature operates from a respectfully shy part of your communication structure, it gets bullied out our your attention by your active mind. You’ll be able to use this awareness as a tool to regain more control over the leading, pushy nature of your active mind.

Your truer, more mature deep parts of your spirit get to become a more influential part of your cognition processes and therefore get to steer the ship, instead of the part of the mind that will knock your attention span out of the way, like a kid fighting for free candy.”

May you use this full moon in Leo to your attentional advantage and keep your heart and goals focused on the love that you have to share – to be that presence, that presence that you need to be in order to fly through all your noble struggles while in a human body, living in a world with lots of other nobles. Amelia Earhart’s courage and Bessie Coleman’s courage transcends anything that I’ve ever known.quote-the-air-is-the-only-place-free-from-prejudices-bessie-coleman-39916

earhart

quality

one teaching doctor says
“humans operate
with the law of quantity
over quality.”

i resist, but listen
anyway

when we have an injury
we compensate
and use extra effort
to accomplish a task

we might not even realize it,
while our ‘new’ habit-pathways
are seamless – to us.

we practiced it, until we had
forgotten.

to get around the trouble
of doing one thing, me might
enlist a few extra sets of muscles.

i should admit now that
this is not really a poem.

but I’m curious,

how are we so ingenious?

women return

sisters find in each other,
the silence

a hug

they meet and greet,
they come and go

we light candles for our families
and gaze up at the moon

let the earth be our messengers
who passes on all the real votes,

when we are heard by the river
and we listen deeply to her.

a wolf’s path

guidance comes in all the spaces,

enter the cave
to see the vision

but be clear,
about who you are.

You are the candle.

Exchange is not Mandatory

When we live by our hearts,
we may choose to walk alone.
Because trying to match everyones’ beat
isn’t quite “making the band.”

When our integrity is challenged,
we do and say what needs to be
said and done from our hearts.

in response.

There doesn’t need to be
a response to walking.

Walking is its own thing.

When we go within and set our
mind upon the infinite,

we have to let go a little.

My wholeness is not contingent
on whether or not I have
been received.

My wholeness does not need to
be mirrored in the world around
me.

But it is,

Sometimes I look up or down
or straight ahead, and what I
see, I want to identify with.

The choice is mine.

Excitement! Art for Art: Free Verses!

Hello dear friends & welcome new followers!

I am delighted to share with you that my 1st book of poetry is published and available. It’s available immediately at the CreateSpace eStore. It’ll be able at Amazon.com in 3-5 business days (now available!), and to a wider audience in 6-8 weeks!  The thing is, to me, this was everything: I finished!

May you all have a Happy New Year – Chinese Lunar New Year is coming up – let the festivities continue while we work!  I hope. I can breathe now… well, sort of… I’ll sign and autograph as you request. I had one or two of those already. It may take some time as I am just adjusting to my new schedule, but we’ll work stuff out on a case by case basis. Please use my contact form, and just allow me 24-48 hours to get some thoughts together, and of course, to be in front of a computer again.

Ps. I have taken note that every time I write, there are crickets!  Right now! Bright daylight, and I hear crickets near the screen door.  So grateful!! Remembering this.